Sunday, September 25, 2011

What a difference a year makes.

Wow! What a year this has been. I am completely amazed at how different life is right now compared to this time last year.
In order for me to fully explain what life has been like, I must first back track about 3 years before this time last year. At that time I was frantically looking for a job just before Jonathan and I got married. My plan was to have a house, a job and to be moved from Northern Kentucky all just before our wedding. I ended up taking the first job that was offered to me and was so excited because I was already pretty familiar with the company.  After only a few weeks in this position I quickly discovered that I was very much under qualified for this job, but was determined to make it work some how.  So much determined that I allowed myself to be miserable for the 3+ years I was there. I found myself working many extra hours just to keep up with the unbelievable work load, allowed myself to be degraded by others and even behaved badly in an attempt to fit in.  Emotionally and physically , my life revolved around my job. It was kinda sad that I spent my first 3 years of marriage, married more to my job, a terrible job at that.
So in October 2010, I was called into a meeting room and was told I was getting"workforce reduced"along with 7 other people that day. As rotten as the scenario seemed at the time, I look back now and see they really did try to be as decent as they could when breaking the news. I even got a little severance out of it. It was probably best that it happened that way rather then working there another year and possibly being fired because of my performance.   I can remember going home that day and being in shock. I had a million things running through my head but the biggest was the mess that I had to leave on my desk for my co-workers to figure out. Some of the same people I had a hard time working with, I strangely felt guilty for the unfinished work still on my desk I had to leave them. I had a strong urgency to call  2 of my biggest clients to let them know I was no longer working for the company so they wouldn't keep sending me emails.
My first week off was mostly a blur. I believe I was still in shock  much of the week. I was feeling more sad because I was suddenly cut off from the only life I had known for the last 3 years. All the clients and co-workers I talked to daily were suddenly not a part of my life anymore. It was even sadder that some people who I thought were friends, really could have cared less that I was gone (except for AmyS. Love ya Amy!) It was just business as usual.  I spent many months while I was off trying to fight off the bitterness of what happened, something that kept me up at night. I started to see just how much this job was a part of my life, too much of my life. How could I stay at a job that consumed so much of my personal life?  I allowed myself to stay at this job because of fear. Fear that I couldn't do another job. Fear that I wouldn't find one that paid as well. Fear of having to start over. While dealing with all those fears, I was also dealing with the daily mental and emotional challenges of a job I didn't like and didn't do well.
As the months rolled by, I started my job search. In November I started working with a company that helped me with my resume and also provided some refresher courses on how to's and what it's like to find a job in today's job market. I must say, they put an awesome resume together for me. It's very hard to make your own resume at a time when you feel like you have no usable skills that employers will want. I gave them my work history and they were able to figure out the best way to sell my skills.  The only positive about my previous job I would say is that I was given the opportunity to learn new usable skills that looked great on my resume. Once my resume was done and my study courses were complete, I was more then ready to start my search.
I got my first interview at the end of November. After answering some questions by email, doing a phone interview and taking a basic skills test, I was told that I made the top 9 of over 400 applicants. I ended up finally going to the interview and it went well but was told that there were other applicants that had more years of experience that would likely be chosen. Even though I didn't get that job, I have to say it was a great boost to my self-esteem to hear that I was in the final 9 of 400. It was also great to hear that I had done well on my basic skills test, which really surprised me since I have been out of school for so long. I scored a 98% on the business reading comprehension and a 94% on the Math. Even though I studied especially hard for the math, I was still surprised I scored so high since math has always been my weakest subject.
The job prospects started to look bleak about half way through December. I was really starting to get worried but people kept telling me that things would start to pickup after the first of the year. And that they did. About the second week in January the job options just exploded. I was able to apply for over 15 jobs within 1 week, all of which appeared to be a good match for my skills. I started to receive calls pretty quick and started interviewing again the last week of January and continued with at least 1 interview a week for the next 6 weeks and at least 2 of those weeks I had 2 interviews! As exciting as it was to get a call for an interview, I was starting to get pretty discouraged with the rejections. Some interviews were great. I would leave feeling great and think I had a real shot only to be deflated with a phone call or email a few days or weeks later. Other interviews were down right awful. I would get there and realize I was not qualified for the job. I would fumble my way through the interview and would pray they would end it quick to put us both out of our misery. The interview process is definitely and emotional up and down process.
While my self-esteem was slowly being plucked away a little everyday by perfect strangers, I found myself slipping into the dark pit of depression and also found myself experiencing insomnia for the first time in my life.  It was kind of nice to not have to worry about driving through the weather through the winter, but it left me at home closed up all winter. This is not good for someone that struggles with seasonal depression. Many days I didn't even step outside to go get the mail. Many people tried to convince me to get out and take advantage of the time off but I found it very hard to get out without feeling guilty for not being at home looking for a job.
Unemployment is also another hassle of being unemployed but also a God send. No matter how much I worried about money during this time, things always managed to work out. I had my severance for the first few months and then my unemployment benefits kicked in. And strangely during this time, Jonathan was getting all kinds of overtime and even had the chance to work a prevailing wage job which easily made up the difference from my unemployment check. As much as I worried during this time, God was always providing for us. And because of that we made sure to stay faithful with our tithing.
So about mid February I received a call from a company called 4Over saying they were hiring 3 new customer service reps. I did a phone interview and then went in for my interview. The interview was the easiest one I had been on. The people who I interviewed with were completely approachable and not the least bit intimidating. I was pleased to learn that I was completely qualified for the job, based on what they wanted. During a time when companies are cutting, they were hiring 3 people! I felt I had a pretty good shot but had learned to not get my hopes up. Two weeks later they called me back and asked me to come back for a second interview and was pleased when that interview also went well. A few days later I received a call from 4Over making me a job offer. I was so excited! The pay was good, the hours were great and the people seemed great too. How could I turn that down?? I said yes right away.  I started on March 28 and hit the ground running.
It's six months later and things are great! I have learned soooo much at my new job about an industry I had no experience with. I just had a 6 month evaluation and they say they want to keep me around.  I am very much excited to be a part of a company that is growing by leaps and bounds and occasionally does some really cool stuff. Best of all, I can honestly say I love the people I work with. I know that we all have our ups and downs, but I really do look forward to coming to work and seeing these shining faces! This is by no means a glamorous job and I do have moments when I need to step away but the people make all the difference. It feels great to go to work and feel like a contributing member of a team. It's also great that I can give my 100% at work and go home. I am not stressed and overwhelmed by work while sitting on my couch at home. This has freed up sooo much time in my life that I now have time for things that matter most in life.
And now time for the thank yous. I have to say thank you to all my family who were very supportive and encouraging during this time, especially my mom who told me many times what I needed to hear. And also a thank you to all my supportive Facebook friends. Many of you were the only people I talked to during this time while I had myself holed up for the winter. Your encouragement, support and prayers everyday were greatly appreciated. A great  BIG thank you and I love you to my husband Jonathan. You are always my rock during these times. Many times you could have hounded me about my lousy house keeping while I was home, but you didn't. You could have slapped me silly to get me to snap out of it, but you didn't. Instead you were always patient, encouraging and hard working. You always had faith that things would work out.  I know this will not be the only time in our lives we will face unemployment so I am certainly going to take some life lessons from this for next time.
The last thank you must go to God. Even though I didn't pray through this as much as I should have, He was always watching over us and continues to provide us with everything we need. He will always see us through the good times and bad.
Thank you all again.

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